Tips on How to Give an Unforgettable Wedding Speech
Alissa Walseman – March 1st, 2023
Speaking in front of your loved ones’ can be super nerve wracking. There’s no doubt that you would like to be the person that gives the most memorable toast at the wedding!
A great speech sets a good tone for the rest of the night. Not only does it honor the couple, but it also gives their wedding guests a glimpse into the couples’ lives together. As a Charleston wedding photographer, I’ve seen people give phenomenal toasts. (I’ve seen some not-so-great ones, too). Before you start freaking out or signing up for lessons in public speaking, here are a few pointers to nail your wedding toast.
Keep your speeches to your closest people
Traditionally, the maid of honor, best man, and newlyweds themselves are the ones to take the microphone throughout the evening. You can have as many people give speeches as you’d like, but something to keep in mind is that while speeches are happening, your guests are listening to a speaker and not dancing or interacting. A few years ago I filmed a wedding during which there were 3 speeches at once, and the final speech was 30 minutes long. Their guests sat in their seats hungry and the DJ paced on the sidelines (because they had to readjust their playlist to accommodate the longer speeches).
Many of your loved ones are going to want to congratulate you on your big day, it’s best to put a limit on the number of people giving speeches.
Your inside joke will probably fall flat
Telling an inside joke excludes most guests at a wedding. When you start telling an inside joke, it signals to the audience that it’s okay to stop listening because the story isn’t about them. Once you lose the audience’s attention, it’s tough to get it back. If you want to tell a joke, make sure that all guests can enjoy it.
Keep it Short and Sweet
Have you been to many weddings before where you thought that best man’s speech was too short? Chances are you haven’t. Keep your speech to three minutes or less. Five minutes should be the maximum time. Make sure to to practice before the wedding. The better prepared you are, the more comfortable and confident you’ll sound. If you make eye contact with the guests and connect with your audience you’re more likely to keep your speech at 3 minutes.
Talk About the Couple
You probably know one person in the couple better than the other, but it’s imperative that you talk about both people getting married when you’re giving a toast. If you only talk about one entity, you’re excluding half of the guests. It’s important to remember that on their wedding day, you and the guests are at the wedding to celebrate the marriage, not your relationship with the bride or groom.
Wedding Toast Template
- Say who you are. Odds are that most guests won’t know you.
- Thank the hosts. Immediately express gratitude towards the couple or whoever is hosting the wedding
- Talk about when they met and add supporting memories. Your value as a speaker is the first-hand memories shared with the couple. Sharing those memories with the couple is a great way to invite the audience into those memories to give them a new view on the couple that they haven’t seen before.
- Make it heartfelt. Make sure to tell the couple how you feel about them. Tell them how they have influenced you. It’s ok to be sappy in this moment.
- Congratulate the newlyweds. Don’t forget to give the couple well wishes on their life journey. You would be suprised by how many times people leave this out.
- Raise your glass (and encourage guests to do the same). And, if you want to level your speech up, find a quick way to incorporate an earlier part of your speech within the toast portion. It’s an excellent way to wrap your speech up.